When is it appropriate to “let go” someone vs. to “hold on” to someone?

I have knowledge about something about a friend of mine, that defies everything I believe in and stand for. Yet this friend is so close to me, I dare to say he could be my twin. Yet this new knowledge is so disappointing to me and overall so degrading, that I have been struggling all week not knowing what to do about this situation.

Ever had a situation where you knew the right thing to do but you didn’t do the right thing out of loyalty to that person, or perhaps out of the addiction you have to that person?

You may have spent your childhood with that person or a big part of your adult life, and you can’t imagine them not being there anymore. But the pain you feel because of the choices they make, is almost unbearable.

So when do you cut the line, draw the line, shift the line or do whatever you have to with “this line” and send them on their way so you don’t have to compromise your Self anymore?

I have let a best friend of 12 years go because what I found out about her was so contradictory to my own beliefs and my own values, that she became the “test” for me to see if I would sell out or not. I let her go and today, more than 2 years ago, I have no regrets about it. In fact, after our parting other people of much higher quality of character started to enter my life and life took a turn for the better for me.

So this week I tried to remember the blessings that came out of me sticking up for what is right and I tried to have this talk with this friend last week and it didn't go over too well. I’m in a similar boat and I have to make the same decision once again. And it’s harder this time, even though it “shouldn’t” be. I struggle to “cut loose” and “let go” but I don’t want to “hold on” to the friendship either – because I overall realize that we have already lost whatever we have to hold on to for dear life. I have a saying and belief that whatever is mine cannot be taken away from me. So if it’s mine and I let it go, it will come back to me tenfold. If it doesn’t come back it was never mine to begin with.

Perhaps you can see and feel that I’m just writing for myself today, trying to come up with the courage and guidance for myself to set this person on their own journey. It will crumble his world, as he states. What makes it harder is that my previous friend had a group of support to help her through the break up of our friendship. This person doesn’t…

Why is it so hard to break other people’s hearts just so we can stay in integrity with our own karma and life journey???

Wish me blessings and healing for my friend so he too can make changes in his life and move on and grow.

And my final words from Christian Larson:

“Thus sings the poet, and we call him sentimental; that is, at first thought we do. But upon second thought we change our minds. We then find that faults and defects are always in the minority, and that the larger part of human nature is so wonderful and so beautiful that it needs must inspire admiration and love in everybody. With all their defects there is nothing more interesting than human beings; and the reason is that for every shortcoming in man there are thousand admirable qualities. The poet, being inspired by the sublime vision of truth, can see this; therefore, what can he do but love? Whenever his eyes are lifted and whenever his thoughts take wings, his soul declares with great eloquence than every before, “What a piece of work is man!” Thus every moment renews his admiration, and every thought rekindles the fire of his love.”

Christian Larson encourages us to “Follow the vision of the soul. Be true to your ideals no matter what may happen now. Then things will take a turn and the very things you wanted to happen will happen.

“The ideal has a positive drawing power towards the higher, the greater and the superior. Whoever gives his attention constantly to the ideal, therefore, will steadily rise in the scale.

“Take things as they are today and proceed at once to make them better.

“Expect every change to lead you to something better and it will. As your faith is so shall it be.

“To be human is not to be weak. To be human is to be all that there is in man, and the greatness that is contained in the whole of man is marvelous indeed.”

Sometimes I find myself wanting to be weak and lowly and sit and dwell, feeling almost sorry for myself. Sulking in the “bad” and letting my energy sit low and dormant. It’s during those times that people who have tended to their self-discipline pick themselves up and say “no more, I’ve had enough of this” – and because of that tactic in spite of them wanting to stay “low” that they succeed. So if you feel weak and like you’re wanting to give up, remember that life comes and goes in cycles with a precise rhythm, don’t give up, keep on going and enjoy every moment of it: good and the seeming not so good.